Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Ode to Freecycle
About a month ago, I signed up for the Ozaukee County Freecycle group with my Yahoo! account. I had heard about it through friends and finally had some time to become a member of the group so I could check it out. If you're not familiar with Freecycle, it's kind of like Craigslist, except that all the items are free. It's like this great big swap of free stuff. I haven't posted anything of mine on there yet, but have acquired some boy clothes for Caleb and a nice baby highchair for my parents to use when we visit them. I enjoy watching the different posts to see what treasures are out there that people would normally have just tossed into a landfill. What a great way to reduce, reuse, and recycle!
Friday, November 5, 2010
A moment to reflect....
I haven't been as good about posting lately. Usually I try to at least upload a picture and write a short "caption" about it. *sigh* For some reason, I've just been having more down days. Of course, Tim has been wonderful. He doesn't fully understand how or why I'm feeling the way I do, but he's accepted it and just offers to help with dinner and even let me take a nice hot bath the other night.
The past few nights, I've gone to Moments for Moms and then had a meeting with all the women interested in being mentors and mareas (the ones wanting to be mentored) at church while Tim watched the kids for me.
Moments for Moms was good. We talked about forgiveness and one of the women mentioned a story where she was really holding onto a woman's reaction/comment to the point that it became an unintentional idol. She let it consume her thoughts rather than letting go and having God work through her and believe His Truth. It was an eye-opener for me. I realized that I have lots of little "grudges" that keep coming back to me and I never fully let them go. I prayed when I got home and God just gave me peace about a few feelings that I had been harboring and gave me strength so that when I do see certain people again, I won't be afraid to bring up the topics that caused a rift in the first place.
The mentoring meeting also went well. I was able to chat with some of the younger women and get to know them better. We also did a speed dating game to sort of interview the ladies that were hoping to mentor us. It was such a blessing to meet such wonderful women! I felt that I was able to connect with almost all of them and it was really hard to write down three names of potential mentors that I wanted to be paired up with. I'm really looking forward to having a more experienced woman walking alongside me with my journey as a mother, a wife, and child of God. I just need someone to challenge me to spend more time in the Word and help me grow as a person. Hopefully I can bless that other woman just as much as she blesses me.
Another thing that we're working on at home is starting some family worship time. This is outside of going to church and just casual talk about God or even bedtime prayers. It's supposed to be a time to teach our children about our faith and take time to share with each other. Tim is an amazing man of God and this gives him an opportunity to continue growing into the spiritual leader that God intends him to be. The 'Love & Respect' study that we're doing with a few other couples at church only brings us closer together. I'm learning to encourage Tim even when I would probably do things a little differently. I didn't realize that by trying to be helpful by showing him the way I like things done, I was coming off more as criticizing and ultimately disrespectful. Then of course his reactions came off as unloving to me... and we started the Crazy Cycle! lol... It's so nice to recognize some of the signs and how to love and respect each other better.
On a happy note, I'm on my way to feeling more spiritually fulfilled. One of my chats last night, I was asked how being a stay-at-home mom was going. Somehow, I had a revelation and it hit me that the reason I was feeling so down lately was because I started an internal crazy cycle. I wasn't getting as much done around the house and was spending less quality time with the kids. There was too much to do that I couldn't wrap my head around it so I just vegged out and read a book instead or watched movies with the kids. This in turn made me feel lazy and unmotivated to get the growing list of things done. Once I made a list of what needed to get done, my thoughts were more organized and I resolved to tackle each thing one at a time. It was so rewarding to cross those things off my list. :-)
Wow, this post is getting long! I do have one more happy thing to report. My best friend from college finally got engaged and she asked me to be a bridesmaid! I'm so excited for her and honored to be in her wedding. I was a little nervous since I know there are going to be a few more expenses in the check book than we were anticipating and we'll have to figure out how to manage the kids during the wedding and traveling... etc. But, our God is an awesome God and he'll take care of all the details!
That's all for now. Don't forget to read Grace Like Rain if you haven't been keeping up to date on those posts. Thanks for reading! I'm so blessed to be surrounded by so many friends. Love you all!!!
The past few nights, I've gone to Moments for Moms and then had a meeting with all the women interested in being mentors and mareas (the ones wanting to be mentored) at church while Tim watched the kids for me.
Moments for Moms was good. We talked about forgiveness and one of the women mentioned a story where she was really holding onto a woman's reaction/comment to the point that it became an unintentional idol. She let it consume her thoughts rather than letting go and having God work through her and believe His Truth. It was an eye-opener for me. I realized that I have lots of little "grudges" that keep coming back to me and I never fully let them go. I prayed when I got home and God just gave me peace about a few feelings that I had been harboring and gave me strength so that when I do see certain people again, I won't be afraid to bring up the topics that caused a rift in the first place.
The mentoring meeting also went well. I was able to chat with some of the younger women and get to know them better. We also did a speed dating game to sort of interview the ladies that were hoping to mentor us. It was such a blessing to meet such wonderful women! I felt that I was able to connect with almost all of them and it was really hard to write down three names of potential mentors that I wanted to be paired up with. I'm really looking forward to having a more experienced woman walking alongside me with my journey as a mother, a wife, and child of God. I just need someone to challenge me to spend more time in the Word and help me grow as a person. Hopefully I can bless that other woman just as much as she blesses me.
Another thing that we're working on at home is starting some family worship time. This is outside of going to church and just casual talk about God or even bedtime prayers. It's supposed to be a time to teach our children about our faith and take time to share with each other. Tim is an amazing man of God and this gives him an opportunity to continue growing into the spiritual leader that God intends him to be. The 'Love & Respect' study that we're doing with a few other couples at church only brings us closer together. I'm learning to encourage Tim even when I would probably do things a little differently. I didn't realize that by trying to be helpful by showing him the way I like things done, I was coming off more as criticizing and ultimately disrespectful. Then of course his reactions came off as unloving to me... and we started the Crazy Cycle! lol... It's so nice to recognize some of the signs and how to love and respect each other better.
On a happy note, I'm on my way to feeling more spiritually fulfilled. One of my chats last night, I was asked how being a stay-at-home mom was going. Somehow, I had a revelation and it hit me that the reason I was feeling so down lately was because I started an internal crazy cycle. I wasn't getting as much done around the house and was spending less quality time with the kids. There was too much to do that I couldn't wrap my head around it so I just vegged out and read a book instead or watched movies with the kids. This in turn made me feel lazy and unmotivated to get the growing list of things done. Once I made a list of what needed to get done, my thoughts were more organized and I resolved to tackle each thing one at a time. It was so rewarding to cross those things off my list. :-)
Wow, this post is getting long! I do have one more happy thing to report. My best friend from college finally got engaged and she asked me to be a bridesmaid! I'm so excited for her and honored to be in her wedding. I was a little nervous since I know there are going to be a few more expenses in the check book than we were anticipating and we'll have to figure out how to manage the kids during the wedding and traveling... etc. But, our God is an awesome God and he'll take care of all the details!
That's all for now. Don't forget to read Grace Like Rain if you haven't been keeping up to date on those posts. Thanks for reading! I'm so blessed to be surrounded by so many friends. Love you all!!!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Far From Perfect
When I was younger, I was a lot more active and was in the best shape of my life. Now, after having two kids, I'm still getting comments like: "You're so skinny!" or "You don't look like you just had a baby!" Since I've been naturally thin/slender all of my life, 'skinny' just seems like a loaded word and actually makes me feel a little insecure about my body especially since I'm not as active and fit as I used to be. I want to shout back to them:
Outside of all that, my skin is not clear like it used to be after my dermatitis/psoriasis went all crazy during my pregnancies. I'm afraid to even show off my legs because of all the scars and lingering sores on them. My eyes absolutely hate any eye shadow or mascara that comes near them and they reject the idea of allowing me to wear contacts again (I haven't been able to wear them for about two years now.. and miss them!) And don't even get me started on my hair!
They say that beauty comes from within. I just wish I felt as beautiful on the outside as I do on the inside. My husband tries to convince me that I'm beautiful despite the many flaws that I try to point out to him. If only I felt that it was true. *sigh*
Now... if only I could motivate myself to exercise more often and eat a few less sweets. :-)
"Don't you notice my tummy bulge? or my love handles?"
"What about my flat, saggy butt and my drooping milk-making machines?"
I look at my twiggy arms and wish for something with a little more meat on my bones... maybe something called muscles, perhaps?
Outside of all that, my skin is not clear like it used to be after my dermatitis/psoriasis went all crazy during my pregnancies. I'm afraid to even show off my legs because of all the scars and lingering sores on them. My eyes absolutely hate any eye shadow or mascara that comes near them and they reject the idea of allowing me to wear contacts again (I haven't been able to wear them for about two years now.. and miss them!) And don't even get me started on my hair!
They say that beauty comes from within. I just wish I felt as beautiful on the outside as I do on the inside. My husband tries to convince me that I'm beautiful despite the many flaws that I try to point out to him. If only I felt that it was true. *sigh*
Why does it take a
cute dress,
some earrings,
lots of make-up,
a curling iron,
freshly shaved legs,
and some heels
to make us feel BEAUTIFUL?
Now... if only I could motivate myself to exercise more often and eat a few less sweets. :-)
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Blogging Funk
So I feel like I've been in a bit of a blogging funk and just need to force myself to type something, anything. Lots of ideas have been floating around in my head, but I'm never by the computer when I actually feel ambitious enough to follow through. One of my professors in college was a big advocate of free writing. Free writing is supposed to be a string of random thoughts that don't necessarily make sense. I kind of cheat a little bit though and delete and re-write when I think the sole purpose of the exercise is just to create a few paragraphs of word vomit. I know that sounds a bit gross, but I couldn't think of a better way to phrase it and I'm determined to just type as things pop into my head versus going back to ponder on a good synonym. This is kind of relaxing. :-) Maybe I'll figure out what I can write about..... I've been meaning to put up some pictures from this past weekend. I've also wanted to just do a post in Spanish, just to be different. I should probably update Grace Like Rain. Oh yeah... I would like to play around with some formatting and my overall look of my blogs again too. Going back to posting ideas: to nurse or not to nurse anymore, dealing with a crabby little boy, and I'm sure there are others floating around in my head somewhere. I guess that's all for now. It feels good to just spill my thoughts out on a blank page without trying to make it sound or look just so. Freedom!
Friday, September 10, 2010
Let me count the ways...
Oh the things I don't miss about my job!
Rushing around in the morning to get everyone ready
Driving 40 minutes both ways
The crabby customers
The escalated calls
The not-so-family-friendly sick time
The stupid questions from customers
Having to pump during my break and lunch
Losing my freedom to new policies and procedures
Staring at a computer all day
The constant migraines
Oh... and sir, your debit card number is NOT your account number
Thank you for calling and have a nice day!
Thank you for calling and have a nice day!
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Great is Thy Faithfulness
This is just a short post before I head out to work.....
I'm getting closer to being a stay-at-home mom! Only 7.5 days to go! During the process of decision making, I kept reminding Tim that God is faithful and he will always provide for us. We'll be ok with just him working. We have enough in savings right now to last for a while (unless we buy a house... then it'd be a little more tight with the budget, but still manageable). As Tim's doubt was slowly fading away, a grassroots advocacy position became available at the American Heart Association where he worked. He was about to tell his boss that he was interested, when she said that one of the youth market directors was quitting and wanted Tim to take on additional tasks and more or less get a promotion. (and yes... it'd be a raise of some sort too... not just additional work tacked on to what he is currently doing). No matter which way he goes with his job, it is such a blessing to have these opportunities present themselves so close to my leaving the workforce. It's amazing how perfect that God's timing is. Great is Thy Faithfulness!
I'm getting closer to being a stay-at-home mom! Only 7.5 days to go! During the process of decision making, I kept reminding Tim that God is faithful and he will always provide for us. We'll be ok with just him working. We have enough in savings right now to last for a while (unless we buy a house... then it'd be a little more tight with the budget, but still manageable). As Tim's doubt was slowly fading away, a grassroots advocacy position became available at the American Heart Association where he worked. He was about to tell his boss that he was interested, when she said that one of the youth market directors was quitting and wanted Tim to take on additional tasks and more or less get a promotion. (and yes... it'd be a raise of some sort too... not just additional work tacked on to what he is currently doing). No matter which way he goes with his job, it is such a blessing to have these opportunities present themselves so close to my leaving the workforce. It's amazing how perfect that God's timing is. Great is Thy Faithfulness!
Monday, August 2, 2010
A special moment
Tonight as I was tucking Caleb into bed, I sang him a lullaby that I've been slowly trying to phase out since it's more of a baby (and maybe a bit girly) song. I can't believe how big he has gotten. He's FOUR! It seems like it's just happened in the blink of an eye and I feel like I missed a huge chunk of those changes because I was at work. The daycare got to see him more than I did, I think. I enjoyed my special moment with Caleb, taking a stroll down memory lane and cuddling him in my arms. I love my little cuddle boy... he doesn't do it very often anymore... unless hanging on me is the equivalent. lol
I'm SOOO looking forward to being at home fulltime. I'll get to see some of those moments with Sonya that I missed with Caleb and I'll hopefully get to catch up and spend more time with my little boy. God has blessed me beyond belief. My kids are wonderful...even when they're driving me crazy. My husband is amazing... even when I think I'm always right and probably drive him nuts with my mood swings. He rarely argues with me and makes sure that the family is taken care of. Above all, he constantly tells me that he loves me. I almost take it for granted, but just writing this... I'm reminded of the love we have for each other. I'm going to stop writing and spend some time with that man right now.... :-)
I'm SOOO looking forward to being at home fulltime. I'll get to see some of those moments with Sonya that I missed with Caleb and I'll hopefully get to catch up and spend more time with my little boy. God has blessed me beyond belief. My kids are wonderful...even when they're driving me crazy. My husband is amazing... even when I think I'm always right and probably drive him nuts with my mood swings. He rarely argues with me and makes sure that the family is taken care of. Above all, he constantly tells me that he loves me. I almost take it for granted, but just writing this... I'm reminded of the love we have for each other. I'm going to stop writing and spend some time with that man right now.... :-)
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